The Final Installment of The Asshole @ Monday, Apr. 05, 2004

My life is so boring right now that I didn't feel the slightest urge to turn on my computer all weekend. I didn't even feel like checking my e-mail which is rare.

The Asshole called on Friday to ask to me to dinner. I agreed only because I thought I'd give him one last chance, person to person.

Mistake.

I suggested (this is still while we're on the phone) that we find a Mexican place for dinner.

This was his reply (and may I remind you that he's thirty-eight), "I've got a big beefy, burrito you can munch on. And it comes with sour cream afterwards."

Disgusting. Crass. If you're a guy, you might have found that funny but would you have said it out loud to a woman you were trying to impress?

He immediately pointed out that wasn't laughing.

I should have said something more along the lines of, "I'm sorry but most women over the age of fourteen don't want to date a man who is mentally fourteen...maybe even younger" but instead I said, "I'm sorry, I didn't find it funny."

He got defensively huffy, as he had in our short past, "Well, if you don't think that's funny they we probably won't get along because that's my sense of humor."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"No, I'm serious."

"I know."

He groaned, "Just call me when you get out of work," and hung up.

Needless to say, I didn't call and I never heard from him either.

I just don't get it. Did he really think I was going to be turned on by his gross comment? I've taken a small poll and haven't found a single woman who would have laughed at that. Plenty of men found it funny but they also said they would have never said it to a woman they were trying to date. And the groan? It was one of those disappointed, exasperated groans. Could he really like me that much and yet be so disrespectful?

Argh. I know I've said it a million times but I seriously need some Me time. I've been neglecting myself...hell, I don't even bother with make up before I go to work...I've gained at least fifteen pounds since I moved here and my summer clothes are ill fitting. Being in a physically uncomfortable state will never make me happy about living here and being unhappy about myself will never make me happy about someone else.

Meh. What a great way to start the week.